A Personal Mystery

A few week ago, quite by accident, I came across a blog that caught my interest. It seemed something I would have something in common with so I began to read.
The pictures were lovely and the blog well written and interesting. I read for quite awhile. I found a piece about taxidermy (not my thing). Lo and behold there I was. Holding what I assume to be a deer head.
My face, my hair and even my glasses. I stared, open-mouthed and saw that she also had my hands and my smile. But she wasn't me. I called my kids in and showed them the picture. They all assumed it was me and said things like "I never saw you wear that vest" " Who took that picture, Mom?"
No one thought for a minute it wasn't me. I copied and emailed the pic to my kids that live out of state. Same reaction. One even commented on the candle holder in the background and said they couldn't believe I still had that.

So, I contacted the owner of the blog on which I had seen the picture asking who this woman was holding the taxidermy find.
I received an answer but the answer said she couldn't find the picture so she couldn't help me with the woman's identity. The picture had been removed when I went back to look. So, I suppose I am not supposed to know who she is.
Since I had copied the picture to send to my kids I sent it to her along with a picture of me. No answer came. I still check my email daily just in case.
I continue to follow this woman's blog as I find it compelling on its own merit. I find her to be strong and a real inspiration. She is not the woman in the picture as she has pictures posted of herself.
But who was the woman? The woman who was me? But wasn't me.

I was adopted at the age of almost three years old. There were many stories told as it was a private adoption and it seems there was some knowledge of each other. Once I was told I had a twin brother who had been adopted in Mesa, AZ. Then I was told that was probably a lie.
When I saw this picture my imagination went wild.
All the what ifs? came in to play. I admit I think of this woman daily but have no idea why I would happen to see that blog and that picture. The odds must be astronomical.

I will never know. I will always wonder.

An Update

I haven't written for awhile.
It has been a hard winter for us and I have been very discouraged.
Recently things have been on the upswing and this seemed like the place to put it all down.
Being on disability has its challenges. 
There have been times I thought I really couldn't stand being here for another minute. Yet I am still here. And we have qualified for siding and windows and a new furnace so next winter will be much easier.
Our house will be reborn in March.
This house is over a hundred years old and was condemned when we bought it. Although we have done a lot to it it has been nowhere near enough. It can be so discouraging but we haven't given up. Now we will have the house we have dreamed about.
We still have one more side to complete in the backyard of the fence. The one that is there now belonged to the neighbors is barely standing and we are going to continue ours just inside of it.
We have birch trees in the backyard. A cluster of them and when our youngest two were little we built a platform in the branches for a fort.
Now that our youngest grandchild will be having her first birthday next month we are going to make it into a playhouse for her.
We babysit her while our daughter works and are enjoying watching her grow.
I was a stay at home mom but never tire of watching children grow.
Until last year Michael was a truck driver and missed a lot of the growing up they did. He is really enjoying Ka'Leah.
There is a spare bedroom upstairs that I am making into my studio. I haven't decided if I want Shabby Chic or Victorian. Victorian was so gaudy and I love it!
The bedroom also has a bathroom attached to it with a claw foot bathtub. So I am leaning toward Victorian.
Michael is adjusting to being off the road and being at home. He has taken over most of the cooking and actually puts a lot of time and effort into it. (Lucky me). He is a very good cook.

All in all I think 2014 is starting off very well.
While there are always challenges there are also blessings.

I have just reread this blog.

Okay. It is all true, EXCEPT, it sounds like quite the little fairy tale and nothing could be farther from the truth.
We have had a great many struggles under this arbor. We continue to have them.
This past year especially.
We couldn't afford the RV we planned on as living on disability is not something that affords frivolous purchases or vacations.
The remodeling was limited to partially completing the back fence. Michael is diabetic and got a puncture in his foot that concerned us that he would lose his foot.
As it turned out a dog hair had gotten in his foot and gotten infected. Being diabetic made it worse and he wound up with a hole the size of a quarter and as deep as the bone. He is still not fully recovered.
The fence is about 3/4's done.
He lies in bed most of the time, depressed. He has been working for 40 years and doesn't know what to do now. He is critical of everyone around him and then tries to be overly nice to make up. Who is this man?
We have had kids move home and our 18 year old daughter is moving out with her 8 month old baby this weekend.
Our second to the youngest daughter will have 1 year clean and sober on November 16th and she is living at home now until she gets on her feet enough to get her own place.
Tempers run high, off and on, and patience is at a premium.
Our yellow lab was stolen. At the time she was nursing seven puppies. We bottle fed them and they all survived. We still have two of them. Losing her was heartbreaking.
We planted a garden that we weren't able to take good care of. A lot went to waste
I have had little time for my crafts but am starting them again and know that will be good for me.
Next year things have to improve.
All things considered it seemed like a good place to vent and to share.

This is my daughter Amy on her wedding day. On the left is Hannah and on the right is Natalie, my granddaughters.
She got married on June 22nd this year.
I have never seen her look happier and wish only the best for her and her husband Chuck. She has so much love to give and Chuck gives it right back. They are a lovely couple.

We picked the first of our garden today. We are having it for dinner.

It is wonderful growing a garden. Watching it grow and harvesting it as we go along.
One of our many projects right now.

Meet Girlfriend.
She is Mikey's dog. She is a 1 year old Yellow Lab. She is loving and adventurous and as loyal as any dog I have ever met. She was named when we got her. She was 4 months old and had been kept in a small cage and had to fight for food with other dogs when she was let out to eat.
We immediately introduced her to sleeping on the bed and joining us for dinner.Her favorite spot was on the couch by the window, guarding us from all harm. She is now expecting. We have no idea what to expect as she got out and we are unsure of her partners. She will be a great mommy and we will make sure her puppies go to homes where they will be loved.

This is Michael standing under his grape arbor. He put a lot of work into this arbor, realizing a dream he had had for a long time. In the background you see the front porch he enclosed. He has put a lot of work in to this house that was condemned when we bought it in 2000.This was taken this spring. It's been 3 years since the arbor was completed and planted.
Last year it was covered with grapes but lost due to the heat of last summer.
This year we have so many grapes and are determined to harvest them.

This morning I looked up online how to make grapevine wreaths and realized, not only is it simple, but they can also be sold for some extra income. What a great way to clean up the vines when Autumn arrives.

When Michael was gone in his truck there always seemed to be things I had to do. Taking care of home and children and getting ready for him to come home. Now, there is time to explore options and start and finish projects.

Back in January of this year, Michael had a seizure and retirement was forced in the form of disability. It is not possible to drive a big rig after having a seizure.
We have spent the last few months getting him on disability and the struggle of a major life adjustment for both of us. But things are coming together and we are looking forward to this forced life change as one of great opportunities for both of us.

The kids are grown and on their own. Mikey is still at home and has been a help through all of the changes. He has that kind of personality that just rolls with the punches. He is such a blessing.